Living the Dream Presented by Sears Kenmore
by SpicyPony64
Summary: Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy call Sears for a new Kenmore Central Air Conditioner.


Living the Dream

(A pony fic)

Fluttershy shuddered in orgasm as Rainbow-Dash lodged her experienced tongue throughout the nether regions of Fluttershy's pony vagina. "Oh, Rainbow" Fluttershy moaned, almost in tears. "Fuck yeah!" screamed Rainbow-dash "I'm so fucking great at eating candy vag! I love being a pony lesbian!" "But Rainbow!" shrieked Fluttershy "this is wrong!" "I know…" began Rainbow. "but it feels so fucking good!"

Rainbow proceeded to slam Fluttershy down on the floor and positioned herself on top. Forcing her vagina on to Fluttershy's, she then motioned her body back and forth, rubbing their two organs together. Fluttershy was evidently aroused and very wet. "Yeah, you like that, don't you? Little bitch!" Rainbow spat into Fluttershy's mouth, and Fluttershy swallowed it because she was a good little pony. "Yes Rainbow, my love." She responded, obediently. After both ponies came very hard, Rainbow stood up and walked to the kitchen to get some Doritos and left Fluttershy lying in a crippled mess of her own bodily fluids. "I think I just tinkled on Rainbow's pretty carpet" Fluttershy said innocently embarrassed.

Rainbow pranced back into the room and tore open the bag of Doritos using the sheer force of her teeth in an agile motion. While the chips were scattered through the air, she flew after them and somehow managed to catch each one directly in her vagina. "Get off your sorry ass and eat these chips out of my candy vag!" Rainbow screamed. "Oooh….but Rainbow…my bottom is sore." Fluttershy said, in a weak painful squeal. "Fucking bitch! You'll do as your told!" Rainbow screamed. Too afraid to find out what would happen otherwise, Fluttershy stood up and hobbled over. She then met with her destiny and ate all of the Doritos out of Rainbow's vagina. And they weren't even the Cool Ranch Doritos, ya know, the kind that debuted with that one commercial that had Jay Leno in it? They were just the shitty nacho cheese flavor that everyone got sick of back in elementary school. God damn, the only thing that made getting through second grade harder than the piss tub was eating those fucking Doritos every day at lunch.

Rainbow then grabbed the remote control to her TV with her hoof and switched the power on. "So what's the paper say about tomorrow?" a commercial actress asked her actor husband. "NOTHER SKORCHER!" the actor announced. "Fuck this!" Rainbow shouted. "I hate this god damn commercial!" She then immediately changed the channel to her favorite network. "Hello, and welcome back to the O'Reilly factor." "Fuck yes!" Rainbow screamed. "Bill O'Reilly makes me so fucking wet!"

Fluttershy then noticed that it was incredibly hot in the room. Being the innocent pony that she was, she did not understand her own sexual drive and assumed that her increased temperature was just the heat in the room. She picked up the phone with her hoof and dialed Sears, in hopes that she could order a new air-conditioning unit. A man on the other end of the phone answered: "Hat shack." He said, indignantly. "Hello, do you sell air conditioners?" Fluttershy asked, politely. The man did not answer, but shoved his fist through the phone and knocked Fluttershy across the room and hung up. "Why doesn't anyone love me?" Fluttershy cried.

At this point, Rainbow was rubbing her vagina to what was apparently a clip of the twin towers collapsing, when Fluttershy walked into the room. Rainbow cocked her head and stared at her. "What the fuck do you want?" she asked. Fluttershy walked up slowly and said quietly "Ye….yesterday you said you'd call Sears." Rainbow smirked "I'll call today" Waving her hoof in the air, as if she were trying to shoo Fluttershy off. "Umm…..you'll call now." Fluttershy squealed. Rainbow then tossed a vibrating dildo at Fluttershy's head, and she blacked out for several hours before waking up to the site of Rainbow eating herself out.

Following this awkward situation, the two ponies elected to spend the rest of the night re-watching Titanic. "Wow!" screamed Rainbow "Leonardo DiCaprio is such a little prick! Let's fuck!" Fluttershy looked over at Rainbow, once again in tears. "But Rainbow, this movie is just so beautiful!" Rainbow then proceeded to kick Fluttershy in the jaw with her hind legs. "SHUT THE FUCK UP AND EAT MY CANDY VAG YOU LITTLE FUCKING PONY SLUT!" Fluttershy burst into tears. "What should I doooooo?" she screamed.

Suddenly, there was a loud blast from outside and Duke Nukem crashed through the roof, armed with an RPG. "It's time to kick ass and chew gum! And I'm all outta gum!" Following Duke was Hank Hill armed with a paintball gun. "I'm gonna kick your pony ass…..except with paint!" Hank screamed. Hank shot out Rainbow's eyes. Rainbow screamed in pain. "Aaaah! My motherfucking eyes! I can't fucking see!"

Duke proceeded to conclude this matter by shooting a rocket at Rainbow's body, ultimately destroying her. "Heh heh, whata mess." Duke said happily. Duke and Hank then shared a French kiss. "Buck Strickland, I love you." Hank said, looking deep into Duke's shades. The two fags then looked over at a cowering Fluttershy. Duke merely said "What are ya waiting for, Christmas?" Fluttershy understood completely. She then pranced across the room and spent the rest of the night sucking Duke's dick while Hank rammed her pony asshole.

The next morning, the three woke up and felt horrible about the night before, so they decided to take their minds off their shame by playing Night Trap, but that only increased their depression, so they all elected to commit suicide. Later that night, LA police officer Mark Fuhrman found all their bodies. "Niggers." Mark said, and then disposed a single leather glove within the bloody aftermath.

5 years later, O.J. Simpson was sentenced to death.

The morale of the story is; always practice safe sex, make sure you always have an extra stick of bubble gum, and if you think a black guy did it, odds are he probably did.

The End.

Note from Corey Haim: _This fic sucks worse than my "career"._


End file.
